November 12, 2008

Sometimes It Has to Be About You

Sometimes what may be best for us personally, may not be best for those around us. At times we may have to be a little selfish with our decisions in life especially when they affect our mental health and peace of mind. It's not enough to say that because you may hurt the other person in the process what needs to be done can't be. I think we remain in certain predicaments because we are afraid of letting the other party know how we feel with the good intentions of sparing their feelings. Unfortunately, it ends up not only hurting them but you as well. When you stick around in a relationship just for the sake of sparing someones feelings you end up resentful towards that person and miserable with yourself.

When we are honest about our feelings and communicate them in such away that is civil and "I" based, meaning "I have issues I need to deal with and I feel its' best that I deal with them alone," we take the burden of responsibility off the other person and also are honest with them about how we are feeling. For example, even when someone is cheating on you the cause for the breakup is not their cheating, but the fact that you can no longer deal with their cheating because if you could deal with it and some people do, you would stay.

It's hard sometimes to be honest with people but in the end, as one door closes another opens for you and that person. If you cannot love them the way they want to be loved and they cannot love you the way you want to be loved, you allow individuals to come into both of your lives that will satisfy those needs. But even more simply sometimes you just need you time, Time to reflect on the things that you need to improve within yourself that will allow you to be a better person for a relationship and that is just as valid a reason to ask for that space if you need to.

Remember, honesty is the best policy and that includes being honest with yourself.

2 comments:

Aslyne said...

Wow! That's all I can say...lol

Slymnsexxy said...

I hope thats a wow in good way sis..lol